Post by Purple Pain on Sept 4, 2018 9:21:23 GMT -6
Why Your Team Sucks 2018: Minnesota Vikings by Drew Magary
Rest at the link: deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2018-minnesota-vikings-1828711873
There’s a phenomenon that occurs in sports that I have witnessed firsthand, and it occurs when a traditionally snakebitten team casts off its demons and becomes a behemoth even BEFORE they’ve consummated a championship. There’s an air of dominance and irrational confidence that happens during a run where everything begins to feel preordained. It infects the team, the fans, the opposition, everyone. This air … this collective FEELING … so completely dispels historic failure, it’s like those failures never even happened. It happened for the Boston Red Sox. It happened for the Washington Capitals. And for one week—ONE MEASLY GODDAMN WEEK—I could have sworn it was happening for my team. My poor, sh*thead Vikings. They had a dominant defense, a charmed quarterback, and the touch of Jesus after finding themselves the beneficiaries of this play:
They didn’t deserve to win that game, but they did. I could have sworn to you after that game that it was finally the Vikings’ time. My fatalism vanished. This team was one game away from playing the Super Bowl AT HOME, and all they had to do was beat Nick Foles to get there. Nick Foles. Nick f*cking Foles. They were going to do it. It was destiny. I believed. I truly did. And I believed it even more when the Vikings went to Philly and immediately went up 7-0. It was all happening.
I… am a f*cking moron. Shoot me point blank in the head because THIS is the carnage that ensued:
I got one week of happiness, and then this sh*t team couldn’t even hang with Nick f*cking Foles for a single half. That incredible play against the Saints? It means nothing. It was rendered less important than the approximately 700 touchdowns Philly rained down on them the following week. It may as well have never happened. Where did the defense go? WHERE THE f*ck DID IT GO? ARE THEY ALL NARCOLEPTICS?!
Any team actually worth a sh*t follows up the Minneapolis Miracle with a Super Bowl. This would be like if the Red Sox had lost to the Cardinals in 2004. For the second time in this century, the Vikings played an NFC title game where the entire f*cking second half was rendered garbage time. They blew it, and the worst part is that all of the supposed good karma they had built up over the course of last season ended up instantly transferring over to the f*cking Eagles, of all teams. They took it all. They took the irrational confidence. They took the NFC title. They took the Minnesota Super Bowl. They took my pride. They even took the f*cking chant.
They may as well have taken my wife. Here’s a good lesson for you kids out there: never take joy in anything because it doesn’t ultimately matter. The Vikings exist mainly to remind me that hope is for idiots. God, they’re such pieces of sh*t. They’ll never have a chance like that ever again. I wanna die. The ghosts of the birds the new stadium killed cursed them to lose to the bird teams forever.
They didn’t deserve to win that game, but they did. I could have sworn to you after that game that it was finally the Vikings’ time. My fatalism vanished. This team was one game away from playing the Super Bowl AT HOME, and all they had to do was beat Nick Foles to get there. Nick Foles. Nick f*cking Foles. They were going to do it. It was destiny. I believed. I truly did. And I believed it even more when the Vikings went to Philly and immediately went up 7-0. It was all happening.
I… am a f*cking moron. Shoot me point blank in the head because THIS is the carnage that ensued:
I got one week of happiness, and then this sh*t team couldn’t even hang with Nick f*cking Foles for a single half. That incredible play against the Saints? It means nothing. It was rendered less important than the approximately 700 touchdowns Philly rained down on them the following week. It may as well have never happened. Where did the defense go? WHERE THE f*ck DID IT GO? ARE THEY ALL NARCOLEPTICS?!
Any team actually worth a sh*t follows up the Minneapolis Miracle with a Super Bowl. This would be like if the Red Sox had lost to the Cardinals in 2004. For the second time in this century, the Vikings played an NFC title game where the entire f*cking second half was rendered garbage time. They blew it, and the worst part is that all of the supposed good karma they had built up over the course of last season ended up instantly transferring over to the f*cking Eagles, of all teams. They took it all. They took the irrational confidence. They took the NFC title. They took the Minnesota Super Bowl. They took my pride. They even took the f*cking chant.
They may as well have taken my wife. Here’s a good lesson for you kids out there: never take joy in anything because it doesn’t ultimately matter. The Vikings exist mainly to remind me that hope is for idiots. God, they’re such pieces of sh*t. They’ll never have a chance like that ever again. I wanna die. The ghosts of the birds the new stadium killed cursed them to lose to the bird teams forever.
Rest at the link: deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2018-minnesota-vikings-1828711873
... and neither is this Chris guy.