Next HC - Who Do You Want?

Wow, after Adofo-Mensah's press conference, that was brutal.  

What am I about? What's my philosophy?  We're going to build through the draft.
Good start, everyone loves the draft, and you never want to destroy your team though the draft (exception being the Giants, Raiders, Jets or Texans)

We're going to acquire young, fast & physical football players.
Not, old fat and slow soccer players, no sir, no none of those.  

We're going to be selective in free agency.
Good to know they will select players in free agency and not sign them at random.

We're going to connect evaluation with valuation.
It's smart cause it rhymes.

We're going to have a relentless approach to fix out weakness.
That's why he's the boss, the last guy just lazily made everything worse.

We're going to maintain great self awareness of who we are.
Hi!  I'm Ryan and I like fast players, not slow players.

We're going to solve problems with open communication and candor.
Not solve them with solutions though, because that would be hard.

And we're going to consistently put players in a position to succeed. 
So it's not my fault when they fail, remember that.

And the last thing, the most important piece, is we're going to take the North an never give it back.
He actually staggered through most of that line without even reading his notes.  I'm sure that will look nice in print, but at the end of that statement it was not impressive.

Who wrote that script for him?  Or did they just send an intern to a Buffalo Wild Wings to write down the most football-y stuff he heard?  And that begs an even more serious question: why would he need notes for that?  Everything on that list is something every single football fan could think up even after several beers.  

In conclusion, Poles sounds perfect for the Bears.